The reasons for the child's bad behavior
Every day parenting forums are full of questions: "Why does a child misbehaves?
The fight for attention
Each child for emotional balance requires a certain amount of parental attention. If he does not get it in an amicable way, then it is begging for it with disobedience. Parents annoyed make comments nervous. But at least not ignored. To solve the problem, give your child positive attention, then do not have to give a negative.
The struggle for self-assertion against excessive parental authority and guardianship
If the parents violate the child's right to self-affirmation, their own opinion and dignity of the child will rebel.Criticism, notation, morality, orders, notes, caution - it fills the cup of the child. Self-will and disobedience in this case provided. Parents think that because they teach a child how to behave, he grafted healthy habits, but in fact they are only set up against the child itself.
The
development process involves increasing the autonomy of the child,
parents are often not ready to give her heir to the extent necessary.
Thus begins the protest under the slogan "I myself."The purpose of this behavior - demonstrate that the child - a personality. While parents do not recognize it, they do not see obedience. Recognize, respect, trust important business,
consult with your child, do not go in his personal space, let the right to make mistakes - and the child will give you independence and responsible attitude to their lives.
The desire to take revenge
Nevyplesnutye resentment toward their parents, too, can cause the bad behavior of children. Revenge for all the children - for unfair treatment, disproportionate punishment, unfulfilled promises, disrespectful treatment, quarrels, etc. The purpose of this behavior - parents do as badly as they did it, baby.
Loss of faith in himself
Usually this is due to the fact that parents do not believe in child and do not support it in case of failure, and sometimes even name-calling inept. The child is facing some difficulties in one area of his life, and he dropped his hands - he does not seek to achieve success in other areas, thinking that he did not succeed. His self-esteem drops, he resigns himself to the fact that it is "bad".
The needs of these children are the same as the other - they want the attention of parents and respect for their identity, fair treatment. But they are so desperate to get it all, they are trying to make up for this lack of self-defeating ways. They just do not know how to do it differently. Bad behavior child asks for help from their parents.
To understand what is necessary for your child to pay attention to their feelings. If a child is fighting for parental attention, parents are experiencing irritation. If a parent feels the anger, the child defends the right to manifestation of his personality. If the child is taking revenge, then the parent is offended.
If a child feels his handicap, disadvantage, then the parent is in the depths of despair, hopelessness. The more parents experience negative behavior from the child, the worse it behaves a child - he sees that his efforts are bearing fruit and acts with increasing zeal.When your child is driving you crazy,it is necessary to break this vicious circle, and this must stop responding to the child's antics usual way. Control emotions is difficult, but very important to learn how to do it. This skill is useful to you only at the beginning, and later, if you learn how to build a relationship with the child as his friend, not a warden, you do not have to use violence or a child, or to yourself.
So conclusion: if a child misbehaves, switch their negative emotions to positive action. Admit they were wrong and try to understand why a child does so.
Note that the first attempts to improve relations child may worsen their behavior. Most likely he did not immediately believe in your good intentions and suspect attempted manipulation. Do not get discouraged and stick to this line of conduct - if you do not give up, the child will soon feel stupid because of his behavior and will meet you.
If your child is still small, you are in luck, training year-old child is easier, because many mistakes can be prevented. If the child is an adult, the eradication of the consequences of its own deficiencies require effort. Remember the reasons for the child's bad behavior is easier to prevent than to fix, so the sooner you get down to it, the easier it will be to establish a good relationship with your child.
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